Bill Ryan's Other Blog

Business lingo is so freaking obnoxious that it is almost always cringeworthy.  In the annals of obnoxious business lingo, Resource is the worst.  Not when it’s used correctly but when it’s used as a substitute for ‘employee’, ‘person’ etc.  It’s like a virus.  You have some insecure coworker (usually a Project Manager or manager wannabe) who tries to advance by copying the boss instead of doing his job better.  And they hear it one day “We have several resources that specialize in X”. They now have the virus.

They’ll dip their toe in the water with a first email.  “I was looking for a resource that can help me on X”.  They think to themselves “HOT D4MN – I SOUND COOL AND IMPORTANT.” And it’s over from there.  Within 24 hours later you’ll be reading about Technical Resources, Non-Technical Resources, Billable Resources, Non-Billable Resources and any other combination their evil minds can concoct.  Well guys, a few things:

• It sounded douchey (and Pathetic) back in 2002 when it first became popular
• Each time an additional person starts using it, it gets douchier (and more Pathetic)
• If you’re using it today, it’s not just douchey but it also tired (and Pathetic)

Let me help you out ok folks?  If you use it, you’re getting laughed at behind your back.  I promise you.  Your coworkers are spending time talking about what a complete and utter douchebag you are. So quit it.  Want proof that it’s douchey?

Use it in any other scenario and see what it sounds like

• When picking the child up from school (“Honey, can you pick up the non-billable resource today, I”m working late?”)  How does that sound?
• When going out on a date. (“Dude, you should see the **** on the non-techincal resource I’m going out with tonight?

Get it?  I challenge you to find any situation where it doesn’t sound completely douchey.  So seriously, grow up and cut it out.  On behalf of all the coworkers of people who use “Resource” in emails – STOP IT ALREADY YOU FREAKING DOUCHEY RESOURCE!